i don't need to reign supreme, all i need are sounds of ecstasy.

Forget everything I wrote. I'm not going to write about my mistakes. All I can do is do my best at not making them again. It may be too late to change some things that have happened, but it's never too late to fix yourself.

you're slow to learn, but you can't win with her no no

Lindsey and Megan picked me up yesterday and we went to Barnes & Noble, where I got to run into Catie :) I ended up buying those first three books, and the last one.. Candy.. I think will be the next one for me to read. Lindsey let me borrow it and I'm probly going to look into it after I finish Perks of Being a Wallflower.

So yeah. I didn't go to school today. Staying up late on school nights and not going to bed at least one weekend day has been killing me and I finally feel better. I hope this helps me get more organized, even though I got my grades back today and they're not too bad! Better than I thought they'd be. Only bad grade is in English. I miss having Wukovits!

I've noticed a lot of my blogs are just kind of rambling on about my day, and it'd be cool if I could write blogs about my beliefs or giving advice, stuff like that. But I can't. I'm always flip flop on all that stuff so I've given up, haha. Oh yeah! And NO MORE calling me before 7. Not even if it's a 2 minute conversation.. I keep forgetting and I'm running all of our minutes. I'd like to talk to some of the people that call, but I can't do it anymore. So unless it's a weekend when it's always free, I'm not going to pick up anymore. Oh! oh! oh! The Office season 5 starts Thursday :) So I'll be at Desiree's watching it!

"I got pulled over by a horse"

Yeah. Last night ended up being pretty cool. I can now officially say I've slept at the beach (with Van, Fernando, Megan, Melanie, Desiree, and Anna). I don't feel like writing about it. Happy Birthday, Anna!

my endorphins are hiiiiiiigh

and I don't know why :) maybe it's this wonderful weather. Or this great music I keep finding. Or the fact that I know some wonderful people. I'm not even sure if endorphins is the right word, haha.

Yesterday I went to Amigo's with Rob and Brooke. I got this massive burrito, like the size of a football! And there was this drink that was soooo good. It was like pink lemonade with cranberry or something, I'm not really sure. But it was one of the best drinks I've ever had. Then after that we went to Brooke's and watched Cloverfield, which thankfully they both liked. I let Rob borrow Dead Rising (which is like Grand Theft Auto on crack.. and with zombies) and he let me borrow Jade Empire and Fable. I don't know why I'm telling you this :) But Van's gonna come over later and play it. And last night was good. We slept over at Lindsey's with her and Megan. And tonight I think me and him are going to the beach to stay the night there with Desiree, anna and melanie. And I get to see more MEgan and Lindsey today!! Only two things bugging me; I don't have my phone cause I probably left it at Lindsey's, and I feel like I have arthritis in my elbows. And I'm desperately wanting to critique a movie.

I'm very happy at this moment. And I'm adding more books to the list. I need to go to Barnes & Noble..

I feel slightly stoopid...

I thought I had everything figured out but I just feel lost again. What the hell is wrong with me? I feel like I can't stay at one place. Whenever I get at this peak, I start thinking too much and get jolted back to this weird mood. I'm not over analyzing, I'm just not satisfied. I've gotta work on myself more.. I've changed too freakin much. I'm still the guy with two first names, but I gotta try to be more of a nice guy. Everything else.. it's whatever. I don't know anymore. I don't know what I want or how I want to go about things. Most of my blogs sound so ridiculous because I don't like sharing my entire life with you. But that's okay. I'm doing it for me. Maybe I can start reading more. It's like watching a movie... it just lasts longer. I'll make a list of books that I can cross out when I'm finished reading them. Almost all of these books were recommended by someone else.

(now in alphabetical order)
1984
Angels & Demons
Another BS Night in Suck City
Candy
Crank
Glass Castle, The
Go Ask Alice
Lovely Bones, The
Into the Wild
It's Kind of a Funny Story
Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist
Perks of Being a Wallflower
Prozac Nation
Ruins, The
Rule of Bones
Speak
Stargirl
Twilight

tie dye kits and stained fingers!

Actually, the solution to dye stains is bleach :) Might burn a little but it'll come clean off. Not the exact box we used, but close enough.. I had a good day. I'm probly gonna wear my shirt Saturday to the beach or wherever we're going, even though it turned out pretty lame. It's the idea I guess. Can't wait!

"caaandy cane"

Talking about favorite candy leads to a list of favorite candy...

Chewy Sprees.
Reese's Pieces.
Hugs, not Kisses.
Peanut Butter M&MS.
and crunchy ones, but they're extinct.
Whoppers!
Pop rocks on occasion :)
Candy pumpkins. Halloween or not.
Butterscotch candies.
Butterfingers (are always broken).
100 Grand. Worth every penny.
"Circus peanuts".
Watermelon laffy taffy. with the candy seeds.
Wonderfully unfilling Sixlets.
Twix if I'm in the mood.


Candy canes don't make the list.
And chocolate skittles... one of the worst ideas ever.

sleep deprivation

i'm going to be sick today.

take my hand and watch the world go by

So, the other night.. Van saved Mel's life :) It was pretty amazing. Me and Des ("s"!) helped her up but if it hadn't been for him Mel woulda most likely, as much as I don't wanna say it, died. We were like three stories up and there wasn't much to break her fall. So he's now like.. a hero. On the plus side (nothing really sounds too great when you're comparing it to someone almost losing their life) we found a really cool spot to relax at, and it's fun to slide down the rooftops of Sea Turtles! Anna, Mel, Des, Rj, Van, and me all had a pretty good time doing that, playing hide and go seek tag and stuff.

Then last night...it being 7:21 am in the morning and I'm going without a minute of sleep... Lindsey gave me a call while watching Green Street Hooligans, which was turning out to be a very promising movie that I'll have to finish later. Mariah was with her and I wanted to meet her, and hang with the two of them. We ended up decorating Lindsey's place, I owned the two in Guitar Hero, went to Wal-mart for BALLS, and then we took a little visit to the beach where we met Buddah and dipped in the ocean, unfortunately missing the sunrise. Oh, and we went to that Hilton Head diner and saw a lot of strippers. Skanky ones. With boys all over them. I got dropped off maybe 20 minutes ago and now when the two of them are done showering we're going jet skiing! Me and Rye have never been, so it should be funnn. Gonna go try and finish that movie now before I head out. I'm doing all I can not to fall asleep. Bye!

7:41 pm: I forgot to mention about this mexican guy that worked at the gas station next to wal-mart, definitely hitting on Lindsey. He even kissed her, haha.. oh, poor girl. Then he pulled the same stunt on Mariah. But when I went in.... nothing. I felt rejected and annoyed. Anyways, so Mariah became a punk and went to sleep.. we didn't do jet skiing, but Desiree and Van came over to Lindsey's and we played hide and go seek in her house, spooned with each other, and yeah. It was a lot of fun :) And Green Street Hooligans...awesome. yeah, alright...bye!

no school tomorrow!

damnit

I hope you feel better.. and honestly I hope me not being your friend makes you happier, cause it sounds like I've always been in the way of that. I love you..whatever I'm sposed to call you now,

Aaron

telescope eyes, metal teeth

I wish I knew myself better. I always talk about how sure I am of things; my beliefs, my goals, my opinions, my wants, etc. Or at least I act like I know what I'm talking about. Too many times I've given out advice when I should have just listened. And who says what I say is right? People act like there's a thin line between right and wrong, but that's definitely not true. You can't justify what you or someone else made up in the first place. I mean, I guess to some extent there are moral values that should be upheld but even then someone can't say, this is how it should be done. Or this is how you need to act. It's just a bunch of stereotyped bs. I don't want to be called a hypocrite just because my mind is always going back and forth between things, so forget anything I've ever told you. I am so lost.